


Drunken Caroling at 2 AM

by YamiBaki



Category: Superjail!
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Attempt at Romance, Christmas Caroling, Desperate Warden, Drunk Warden, Drunk caroling, Drunken Confessions, Drunkenness, F/M, I'm Bad At Titles, Late at Night, One Shot, Superjail, Warden being Warden, Warden being his wacky self, more Superjail, what am I writing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-24 09:31:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8367202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YamiBaki/pseuds/YamiBaki
Summary: Drink after drink, the Warden drowned his sorrows and feelings of rejection away. And not long after, he was up on stage singing Christmas songs. Somewhere along the lines he'd gotten the brilliant idea to sing Christmas Carols at 2 in the morning to (y/n), and then confess his love to her. This drunken idiot will get himself killed by a sleep deprived and angry Alice if he doesn't stop...





	

She was the kind of girl that got the job done. The kind of girl that didn't live but _survive_ , and wasn't afraid of a little blood. Just like Alice, she's a fighter, the only difference being that she didn't fight often, only when needed. 

 

She was the kitchen help, and the Superjail nurse, and she was the love of the Warden's life. 

 

Or at least, that was what he kept telling everyone that would actually bother to listen to him when he spoke of her. 

 

(Y/n) wasn't always a good girl, she was born and raised on the street, her mother, her grandmother, her aunts, all of them resided in Ultra-Prison with the Mistress. She never wanted that sort of life for herself, so she contacted an old friend, Cherise, who in turn contacted Jared and asked for a job. Long story short, she'd been hired to help in the kitchen of Superjail along with the lunch ladies, and eventually ended up becoming the Superjail nurse. 

 

The Warden had grown to like her with time, going down to see her work in the kitchen and chatting, and even purposely hurting himself just to be treated in the Superjail infirmary. He never did anything too bad, just the simple paper cut, a bruise on his arm or elbow, a small bump to the head and even a small scratch here or there.

 

Being the kind of person that didn't really talk much and did her job as fast and efficiently as she possibly could, she never shooed the Warden away, even when she knew others would have. She would listen to him babble on and on about whatever it was that interested him, and even allow him to flirt with her, she had no problem with it. That only added to the list of things that made the Warden love her.

 

However, the Warden had yet to find a way to profess his love for this beautiful angel. He knew that dating co-workers was against regulations, but he was the Warden, he could do as he pleased. 

 

Finding the right time to confess was rather tough, she was either too busy with all of the injured inmates, or helping out in the kitchen, or sometimes she would be with Alice having a girls night where he'd be kicked out by the larger woman if he tried to sneak in. And the very few times she _wasn't_ busy, he would either be interrupted by Jared, Jailbot, the doctor or some inmate causing trouble. 

 

It really frustrated him, until he came up with the most brilliant idea ever. 

 

He'd confess to her on Christmas, where the snow will fall from the sky so beautifully, Superjail will be at its most festive and a feast will be held. 

 

That's how the Annual Superjail Christmas party was supposed to be. 

But as always, there was fighting and bloodshed, not to mention that trying to find a way to confess his pure, passionate feelings for the lovely nurse was infuriatingly difficult in those circumstances. 

Unlike Alice, (y/n) didn't bring a date with her. And she came dressed so beautifully, it was a casual dress, and it was such a lovely shade of white that the Warden was sure he was seeing an angel walk up to him. He greeted her, offered her a drink and overall tried his hardest to start a conversation, talking about how those rumours about him and Alice weren't true, and even laughing at his own, nervous sounding jokes. 

At some point and time in the night, she had left early to her bedroom. The Warden was sure she was avoiding him, and began to drink heavily, crying to himself and ignoring Jared, who tried to comfort him. 

Drink after drink, the Warden drowned his sorrows and feelings of rejection away. 

And not long after, he was up on stage singing Christmas songs. 

The whole party was covered in blood and dead carcasses, with parts everywhere mixed up with trash and Christmas decorations. Some dead drunks were already asleep on the ground, while Jailbot went on to sweep and mop the place. By now, the Warden was at the bar, still drinking with Jared cleaning up the spilled booze.  

“You know what J-Jared?” The Warden slurred, lifting his head up as best he could to look at his big headed employee.“I THIN- I think I should p-profess my undying love to- ugh, to (y/n)!”

“A-And how are you going to do that sir?” Jared asked, beads of sweat rolling down his face as he cleaned a glass cup. He was trying so hard not to glance behind him at the bottles of various alcoholic beverages, nor glance at the drink in his boss' hand. 

“By singing to her s-songs, of my love!” He announced.“I'M GANNA- urgh! I-I'M GANNA GO TO (Y/N)'S ROOM, AND LET M'- M'LADY KNOW OF THIS B-BURNING PASSION I FEEL!” With that, the Warden stood from his chair, swaying back and forth and nearly falling, but catching himself by gripping onto the bar table. Lifting his hand he chugged down the last of his drink, slamming the glass down onto the table, before turning to make his way to the door. 

“B-But sir! (Y/n)'s sleeping right now, I-I don't think it's a good-” Jared protested, but his words fell on deaf ears, as his boss disappeared from sight. 

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“(Y-Y/N)! I AM HERE TO- Hic- TO EXPRESS MY LOVE TO YOU!” He exclaimed, trying hard to keep his balance, placing a hand on the wall on occasion before turning towards the door to (y/n)'s bedroom.

 _'Stupid door,'_  the Warden thought to himself bitterly.  _'K-Keeping me and m'lady a-apart.'_

Hiccuping, the Warden took in a deep breath and began to sing, hoping that his wonderful carols would awaken his love, and have her running into his arms. “I'M DREAMING! OF A WHITE- hic, CHRISTMASSSSSS!” He slurred, swaying back and forth on his heels, nearly falling over.

“J-JINGLE BELLS! JARED SMELLS! ALICE LAID AN EEEEGGGGGGGGG!!!” His voice echoed all around the halls, no doubt disturbing Alice since her bedroom was just a few doors down from (y/n)'s. But the Warden didn't care, he'd get his woman, no matter what it took. “THE JAILBOT-MOBILE LOST A WHEEL, AND JA- ugh, JACK KNIFE RAN AWAY! Hic!”

“Keep it down out there!” Alice roared from her bedroom, banging on the wall to the halls rather loudly.“I'm trying to get my beauty sleep!”  

“SH-SHUT UP ALICE, LOVE IS HAPPENING!” The Warden grunted, tripping over his own feet and falling to the floor with a loud thud. (Y/n) hadn't opened her bedroom door, leaving the Warden to assume she hadn't heard him. Not bothering to stand up again, since he didn't trust his legs, the Warden dragged himself across the floor towards (y/n)'s bedroom door. 

_Bang!_

_Bang!_

_Bang!_

“(Y-Y/n)!” The Warden called out, sounding like a child whining for their mother's attention. “ _Come out (y/nnnn)_.”

The Warden continued with his carolling for what felt like an eternity, and not once did the young nurse open the door. But no matter, the Warden will just keep singing his melodies for her to hear, until she comes out to greet him. 

“Hic, _IIIII DON'T WANT A LOT FOR CHRISTMAASSS!!!_ ” He sang, throwing his head back to allow his voice to echo through the halls. “THERE IS ONLY ONE THING I NEEEEDDD!! AND THAT'S- ugh, YOU (Y-Y/n)!” When she still didn't open the door, he growled and began to bang his fist on her door, growing angry with his lack of response from the nurse.

_Bang!_

_Bang!_

_Bang!_

She didn't want to come out, did she? She was probably playing hard to get, but the Warden could play that game too, and he'd win. “(Y/NNN)!!! OPEN UP GOD DAMN IT!” He roared, banging his fist against the door as hard as he could over and over again. But just as his rage had arrived, it left, being replaced by a sudden sense of sorrow.  

 His eyes began to gloss over while tears ran down his cheeks, he whined as loudly as he could, ignoring Alice's banging and curses. “(Y/n), why won'y you love me?”

Too busy crying, he failed to hear the soft sigh that came from the other side of the door, and the creaking of the bed as though someone had gotten up. 

Sniffling, the Warden gave a watery smile while jingling the doorknob and hanging from it. His sorrow then turned into happiness, while knocking. (Y/n) didn't hate him, she would never do such a thing. She was the smart, kind, sweet angel of Superjail. And she was kind to him, kinder than most, so there was no way she would hate him. “(Y/n)!” He called out in a sing-song tone, letting out a giggle while hiccuping. “You l-love me right? Yeah, you do- hic.”  

Right as the Warden went into a giggling fit, fantasizing about him and the young nurse, the door to her bedroom open. 

The Warden let go of the doorknob and fell with a thud to the ground, giggling rather than voicing out his pain. Glancing upward, he felt himself float at the sight of his precious (y/n), staring back at him with an exhausted and annoyed expression on her beautiful face. 

“Sir, what are you doing?” She asked, sounding like soft chimes to the Warden's ears. “You do know it's like, 2 in the morning right?”

Arms wrapped themselves around her feet, as a soft cheek nuzzled itself against her pyjama pant leg. “Sir-”

“(Y/n)! Y-You _do_ have feelings f- hic, for me!” The Warden exclaimed, practically purring like a kitten. A groan escaped (y/n)'s lips, burying her face into the open palms of her hands.  

She's never hated the Warden, never really found a reason to. And sure, there were times where his childish personality did get rather annoying, but that was just who he was, and she had learned a long time ago that it was best to accept him the way he was. A drunk Warden though, was hard to accept.  

Heaving a sigh, the (h/c) haired nurse leaned down and grabbed both of his upper arms as gently as she could, trying to untangle them from her feet without distressing him too much. “Come on sir,” she told him gently. “Get up and come inside before Alice mounts your head on her bedroom wall.”

“E-Entering the room of a lady i-in the dark o-of night,” he slurred, letting out a drunken giggle as (y/n) helped him up and brought him into her bedroom. “How- hic! How scandalous!”  

Once they were safely inside, (y/n) closed the door with her foot and helped her drunken boss, who was still singing christmas carols under his breath, onto her bed to lay down. She had heard him when he first arrived there and tried to ignore him in favour of getting a full night's rest, but after hearing Alice banging on the wall, she knew she had to do something to stop him from getting murdered by the larger woman. Heaving a deep, tired sigh, (y/n) pinched the bridge of her nose and tried to calm herself down. She wasn't going to lash out on him, she shouldn't lash out on a drunken Warden, it wouldn't end well at all.  

“Sir,” she began, still trying to keep her cool while the giggling man laid upon her bed, gazing up at the ceiling. “Mind explaining to me why you're out there drunk out of your ass and singing Christmas carols?”   

The woman nearly let out a shriek in surprise when the Warden suddenly sat up, looking as though he had almost forgotten something. She hated when he did that, but on the bright side, it had taught her to be more alert with her surroundings, and that in itself was a good skill to have in a prison like Superjail.  

“Ah, I have a- ugh, a confession to make!” The Warden announced, attempting to stand, only to have his legs wobble and his body sway in his drunken state. “(Y/n), I l-love- urgh!”  

He didn't manage to say what he had wanted to say, for his hands flew to his mouth, stopping himself from upchucking right then and there. As soon as he was sure he was fine, he removed his hands and blinked slowly, before sending the woman of his dreams a sloppy smile. “I am a _man_ , (y/n)!”

“Er,” (Y/n) mumbled, raising a brow at him in confusion. “Yes you are, sir?”  

“Thas right!” He agreed, trying to make his way over to her. “A-And as a man, I gatta do manly things for m'- hic, m'lady!”

The closer he grew, the stronger the scent of alcohol on his person began, and (y/n) had to try her best not to gag. She already knew that the Warden was never really all that good at holding his liquor, and she knew that he knew that, so why the hell was he here in her bedroom, drunk off his ass?

 _'I'll kick Jared in the nuts tomorrow when I see him for letting the Warden drink.'_ She thought to herself, not bothering to move when an arm slung itself across her shoulders in a lazy fashion.  

“A-And as a man, I gatta- hic, I gatta make you accept me as a whole!” He continued, swaying a bit as he flailed his free arm around, trying to explain himself properly. “I wanna be forever locked up i-in- hic! I-In the Superjail of your heart!” 

(Y/n) knew it was rude of her to do so, but she rolled her eyes. As cute as it was for him to profess his love for her, she just wasn't in the mood at the moment to listen. It was late, he was drunk, and this was most likely just him babbling on like he normally would. “That's nice sir,” she responded, wrapping her arms around his torso and trying to gently drag him back to her bed. “It's really, uh, sweet of you to want to lock yourself in the... Superjail... Of my heart...?”

“Yerrr welcome!” He slurred, letting out a bunch of giggles while (y/n) threw him down onto his back onto her bed. 

The Warden was a lot heavier than he seemed. 

She hummed and nodded her head to his ramblings, not really understanding what he was saying through his slurred words, but agreeing with whatever his said to keep him busy. She began to undress him, taking off his shoes and pants, along with his purple coat and top hat, knowing that he wasn't really capable of doing it on his own and because he'd most likely sleep better that way. 

“N-No (y/n),” he slurred, placing his hand on her cheeks and trying to push her away weakly. “I- hic, I am not here for the making of love! I- hic! I am here to tell- urgh, tell you of my loving of you! Hic!”

“Yes sir.” She muttered with a nod. “But right now you're drunk, so why don't you tell me in the morning?” Her words fell on deaf ears, surprising her when she hadn't received an incoherent response from her boss. Pulling off his bow tie, she watched as her boss slowly began to fall asleep, his eyelids growing heavy with the need for rest. She couldn't help but smile a bit, the Warden was like a child in a man's body, but that's just the part of him that made him who he was, and it was the part of him that helped him run all of Superjail.  

Pulling down the covers, she tucked him in gently, before walking around her bed and finally laying down next to her boss. Placing the bow tie onto her side table, she turned off her lamp and snuggled onto her pillow. She listened as the Warden muttered to himself softly, occasionally carolling in his sleep, before finally growing silent and falling asleep. 

“Seriously sir, what am I going to do with you?” She asked herself, a yawn escaping her, before her own eyes grew heavy. “Tomorrow morning is going to be interesting...” She mumbled, before closing her eyes and accepting sleep with open arms. 

The Warden can try to lock himself in the 'Superjail' of her heart in the morning, when he was sober and she could take him a bit more seriously. 

Also, Jared better prepare himself, she was going to make sure she kicked him hard in the dick for giving the Warden alcohol. 

**Author's Note:**

> Bring back SUPERJAIL DAMN IT.


End file.
